In one week it will be Giving Tuesday, another day added to the list of ways to spend your wealth over this holiday weekend along with Black Friday, Small Business Saturday, and Cyber Monday. While I appreciate the smart marketing minds that came up with this I’m going to put out my words of pause.

Thanksgiving at its heart is about gratitude, it’s about joy, it’s about being with those that you love. But in 2017 there’s something else that it’s become about – pressure. Get the deals before their gone, be happy eating all the food you’re supposed to love, and after all that don’t forget to give to charity. It’s a lot of pressure to fit into the holiday weekend.

So here I am to tell you; this pressure isn’t real, get rid of it! Take a minute to take a deep breath, take a moment to yourself and refocus on gratitude. Scream into a pillow, take a walk, do whatever it takes to turn off the chatter about what you’re supposed to be doing this season. I know that’s easier said than done but it’s certainly worth a try for your own wellbeing.

Now that you’ve taken the focus off the shoulds you can take a look at what you want. If you need something and it’s going to be on sale on Black Friday – go for it. If you appreciate your family and/or friends – enjoy spending time with them on Thursday. If you have money to spare in your budget and a cause you’re passionate about – donate on Giving Tuesday.

None of these named days are inherently bad as long as you pause and think about how they fit into your life the best way possible. Often a donation of Giving Tuesday will be matched or even tripled or quadrupled, which makes it a fantastic time to give. But giving your money to a cause you aren’t passionate about or giving money that strains your budget too much just isn’t worth it.

Also please don’t forget that money isn’t all you have to give. You can mark Giving Tuesday by signing up to volunteer for something or giving someone a compliment or some other act of kindness.

You are in control, not the shoulds. If you count everything you’re thankful for this weekend I’m sure you’ll come away with more wealth instead of less.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

Share how you’re taking control this weekend. What are your holiday traditions that bring you wealth instead of draining it?